The night I will never forget

My palms were sweaty like the perspiration from a glass of ice tea on a hot day and I was a bit shaky from the nerves. My mind was racing and winning the Daytona 500. Leanne, the dining hall boss, had just told me I had to share my testimony with over 600 kids that I had never met before. I have never been more excited; but my heart was torn, I was scared speechless. I thought about the hundreds of dance recitals I have been in; but somehow, it didn’t compare. I knew exactly what I had to say. How could you forget your life story? I wrote it down carefully as if I were taking the only notes I could use on an open-notes quiz. I was ready. My life was scribbled onto a fresh sheet of my green journal paper that still had the little frillies hanging off the left side.

It was only an hour until it was time for me to share. I felt as though I were waiting in line for a monstrous new rollercoaster on a hot day and every minute that passed, I would feel more frightened than the minute before. I was in a small un-air-conditioned room with 30 of my closest friends that were serving in different jobs around the camp; but we were all there to do the same thing: impact someone with the way Christ had impacted us. We sat in a circle; some on the comfy couches and the others on the itchy, hard carpet. They were keeping me calm and telling cheesy jokes to keep me from over analyzing and worrying myself over things that were useless to worry about. We settled down and rehearsed the songs one last time and though none of us were professional singers, it sounded as though the room was full of the joyful praises of the angels. When we were done with the last song, the silence was deafening and everything about that moment was as pure as freshly fallen snow at midnight. It was finally time to go to the club room and share what we had rehearsed with the campers. The campers had no idea what was going to happen next so we had to be as quiet as Jerry, the mouse, running past Tom to get the cheese without being caught. We waited outside the club room for our time to sneak in. We all sat in the darkness and enjoyed the perfect night. The grass was long, soft, and a bit damp from the bits of dew. Camp was a good 20 miles or more from any cities to pollute the sky with light so instead, God filled it for us with every star in the universe. The occasional shooting star across the sky wasn’t unusual either. There was a slight breeze that was a breath of fresh air in the choking heat of June. I sat by myself praying and admiring the stars to calm myself. My friends noticed me by myself and sensed my nervousness. They figured that the best comfort was a hand laid, and a prayer said. One by one, they came and prayed over me. It was the most humbling and beautiful thing anyone could ever experience. It felt as though God stopped time and the world around us so that we could experience a love out of this world. I shed a tear of joy as they lifted me in prayer to my Father. Suddenly, our boss broke the silence and the world around us was moving again. She called us in through the back door. It was red and a little squeaky which made it hard to be as quiet as we would have liked. My nerves immediately got worse but I was trying to hold them back; but like a little girl trying to hold back an excited hundred pound Labrador retriever, I could only hold them for so long. I was jittery to the point of not being aware of my surroundings. My friends had to nudge me on the shoulder to wake me up from this trance and make me realize that the line going inside was moving. On the stage, we set up the rows of chairs and benches and then it was time to quietly get in line next to your best friend just like we did in kindergarten. Then we filed in and got situated in our seats while we waited for the campers to come in for the surprise.

The campers drifted in slowly, some were crying and others praising God. Lives were changed and something bigger than us came in with those campers. When they were all there and sitting down we sang our first song. It was beautiful just like when we had rehearsed it. Now, it was my time to share. The seconds that it took for the microphone to get to me felt as long as when a teacher is passing out a test that you either failed or aced and whatever it is will determine the fate of your weekend. It finally reached me and I carefully turned it on and the light on it went from red to green. I looked out into the sea of campers eagerly waiting for what I was going to say, but all I could see was a bright white light shining in my eyes and a few black figures behind that blinding light. My palms were still sweaty and I was afraid that my voice would crack just like my thirteen year old cousin does when he tries to talk to girls. As soon as I opened my mouth, the words flowed swiftly and easily like a hidden stream in the forest; the Holy Spirit had taken over. I shared of my hard past with my earthly father and the suffering that came with it. I then told of the amazing love of my heavenly Father and how He changed my life and that He could also change theirs. I can’t quite remember the exact words that were said, but I know that the Lord spoke through me and that it had come out perfectly. When I was done, I switched the microphone off and the light above the switch turned from green, back to red. Suddenly, for whatever reason those nerves came back on me. My heart was heavy, and my body ached. I had given all of my strength and shared the deepest parts of my heart; parts that were life changing for me and that I hoped would be life changing for others. After one deep breath and the reassurance from my best friend sitting next to me, the Holy Spirit took that weight from me. It was gone and I felt as though there was nothing I could do to make this moment more perfect and peaceful.